Crazyness Ensues
by lalalamarieme
Summary: How can two badass cousins survive Rachel Berry?
1. Little Did We Know

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I would hope that you would know that by now. Hehe.**

**A/N: As you all know, I am from Wyoming. Actually, no one knows that. (Why would you know that?) Anyways... I was thinking about how awesome it would be if PuckelBerry was in good ol' Wyo. And I thought it would be fantastic, so here is my attempt at Wyoming PuckelBerry!!!**

**P.S. Contrary to popular belief, we do not have accents of any kind in Wyoming. (Especially Southern.) We are a part of the Mid-West and we speak like it. So, as you read this, keep that in mind. It's not that there is something wrong with an accent, they're great if you ask me, it's just that we don't have them.**

"Cousin. I swear to God I will punch you in the throat." I said as I pushed my cousin Noah away from me. "The whole point of cruising for chicks is to find _hot_ ones."

Noah laughed and pulled me back to his side. "I'm teasing, Claud." He said. "By the way, it's totally cool that you're a lesbo."

I slapped him hard in stomach and sighed. "I'm not a lesbian, Noah. I'm just—Fine—I'm a lesbian. It's not like your tiny, jock brain could comprehend bi-sexual, anyways."

Noah and I walked quietly along the boardwalk, waiting for Old Faithful to erupt. "Why did you make us come here anyways? This place is totally boring."

"Noah. You're in _Wyoming_. The only thing we have is Yellowstone. If you're going to spend three months here, you might as well have a lame story or two. Plus, it's tradition, We come here every summer."

"I like Wyoming." He said as he nodded at the rest of our family sitting on benches, patiently waiting for the famous geyser.

"I know. It's sucks getting you the hell out of my sight." I joked.

Every summer for the past five years Noah and his family comes and visit for two weeks. Last year, Noah decided that he liked it here so much he was going to spend the entire summer here. His older brother, Joshua, married my older sister, Helen. Noah and I are the same age and we're both pretty badass, so we get along really well. My younger brother, Cole, is only a couple years younger than me and he looks up to Noah a lot, but he's pretty badass too and he does a good job of covering his tracks. And Dani, Noah's little sister, is only ten and she practically worships me. It's kind of cute.

"Whoa." Noah stopped walking and I bumped into him.

"What?" I asked. I followed his gaze and saw a girl in scandalously short shorts and a pair of beat up cowboys boots leaning against the railing. "Oh. Nice choice, Noah. Yours or mine?"

Noah glared at me. "I saw her first."

"Yeah, but look at her. She's obviously a lesbian."

"Like you can tell that just by looking."

"Fine." I caved. "I'll wingman, but if she goes for it, I'm going in for the kill." I said.

"Good luck, cousin." Noah said as he shoved me towards the girl. I straightened my shirt, smoothed my hair, and checked my breath before I leaned against the rail.

"Did it hurt?" I asked.

The girl looked over at me. "Did what hurt hurt?" she asked.

"When you fell out of heaven." I said a cheesy grin spreading across my face.

The girl scoffed and and looked away. "I'm afraid I must inform that I am not interested in the female sex."

I chuckled under my breath. "That's ok. I'm just the wingman. My name is Claudia. That's my cousin, Noah, over there." I pointed over to where Noah was standing with his back to us. It looked like he was talking on the phone.

The girl looked Noah up and down appreciatively. "I am afraid that although your cousin is very good looking from what I can see, I must decline. Today is my only day in Yellowstone and I don not want to miss anything by engaging in a torrid affair while on a family vacation."

"How long are you in Wyoming?" I asked.

"The rest of the summer. I'm spending it with a family friend on their ranch."

"No kidding. Where? I might know them."

The girl looked apprehensive.

"It ok. It's just that I'm from around here and and I thought we could hang out. I could show you the real Wyoming." I said. I pushed away from the railing. "I never got your name." I said holding out my right hand.

"Rachel." She said and shook my hand.

"It was nice talking to you, Rachel. Maybe I'll see you around." I tipped an imaginary hat at her and walked back to Noah.

"So?" He said, eager.

"Sorry cousin. Not interested." I said.

"Bummer." Noah said. I checked him with my shoulder and we headed back to our families on their benches. We made it just in time to see Old Faithful erupt.


	2. Norris Basin

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I would hope that you would know that by now. Hehe.**

**A/N: I'm having a total writer's block on _Not Bothered_ and this lovely plot bunny hopped into my head. I also started this because I would totally be friends with Puck. And Rachel, I could be friends with her too. **

"Claudia, did you know that Steamboat Geyser is the biggest one in the world?" Dani asked me from where she hung on my shoulders.

I smiled. "I had no idea. You know who I'm sure would love to know that? Noah."

Dani slid from my back to the ground and ran a few feet ahead of to Noah. She tugged on his sleeve. As Dani verbally assaulted Noah he scowled at me. I stuck my tongue out at him. I looked behind me to make sure Elisa and my mom were following when I noticed Rachel, the girl from Old Faithful, with two men. One was fairly short with thick glasses hanging on his nose and the other was a taller black man. They were holding hands and pointing at the large plaque detailing the history of the Steamboat Geyser. I smiled to myself. _I love gays._

"Rachel!" I called and jogged up to her.

She turned with her eyes wide, when she recognized me a smile graced her face. "Claudia. Hello, I didn't think I'd see you again."

"Everyone comes to Norris Basin." I said.

"How do you know I didn't come here first?"

"Everyone goes to Old Faithful first. Believe me, we do it every year." I said.

"Rachel?" The smaller man said. "Who's this?"

"Oh! Sorry Daddy! How rude of me. Dad, Daddy, this is Claudia...."

"Custer." I supplied and shook their hands.

"Nathan." The short man said.

"Anthony." The other introduced himself. "How do you know Rachel?" He asked.

"We met at Old Faithful. She was telling me that you're staying at a friend's ranch?"

"Yes." Nathan said. "We're staying at Turpin Meadow Ranch."

I nodded. 'With the Baltes', no kidding. That's only about twenty minuted from Riverton, where I live."

"You know the Baltes'?" Anthony asked.

"Oh yeah. I go to school with their son, Andrew." I said. "He's really tall and all legs, has a habit of tucking his pants into his boots." _I hate that. You just look stupid. _I added in my head. Anthony and Nathan laughed, Rachel blushed and stabbed her toe into the ground. "Well I have to catch up with my family, but maybe we can hang-out while you're here, Rachel?"

Rachel's eyes were wide as she stumbled over her reply. "I-I don't really think that would be a-appropriate, because I don't really kn-know you and—"

"Rachel! Don't be rude!" Nathan scolded.

"It's ok. Maybe you guys can come over for dinner some night. My mom loves guests." She didn't, and she would make me clean every nook and cranny before they came over, but I didn't really care.

"That sounds wonderful, Claudia." Anthony said. He began searching through his pockets for what I assumed was a pen, but I pulled out my cellphone. "Oh, good. Rachel give her your cell, so she can reach us." He said. Rachel opened her mouth to protest. "Rachel, please."

Rachel grudgingly gave me here number and I sent her a quick text to make sure it wasn't fake. I waved goodbye to her and her fathers, and jogged back to my own family.

"Claudia! Where have you been?" My mom asked.

"I ran into some people I know. Did I miss anything?" I asked.

"Dani wants to live in Yellowstone." Cole said, snapping his cellphone shut.

I laughed. "Of course she does." I walked ahead to where Noah was holding Dani's hand and pointing a brightly colored pool of water. "Where are you going to sleep when you live in Yellowstone, Dani?" I asked standing next to her.

"I think I'm gonna live at the bottom of that really big waterfall."

*****

It's really lame that Noah and I always get shoved into the back of the car, but we always do. After the first three years we sort of claimed it. Our moms drove, Cole and Dani fought in the middle, and Noah and I chilled in the back. We normally watched a movie on laptop during long trips like this one, but it was fairly late and Dani was falling asleep against the window. I wouldn't let Noah start up _Inglourious Basterds_ and risk waking up Dani.

"Dude." I said, punching Noah in the arm. "You'll never guessed what happened at Norris."

Noah raised an eyebrow at me and I punched him again. I was jealous. "Ow. What?"

"Remember that girl with the great legs at Old Faithful?" I asked, a smug smirk spreading across my face.

"No way! You saw her?"

_God, I love being so badass._ "Better. I got her number." Noah's jaw dropped.

"How?!" He asked incredulously.

"I convinced her family to come to dinner." I replied.


	3. Home, Sweet Home

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I would hope that you would know that by now. Hehe.**

**A/N: I'm really excited. I'm powering through these chapter like nobodies business. Given, they _are_ fairly short. By the way, totally AU. I think. No pregnancies, no sleeping with best friend's girls, no blackmail to join Glee, no football style Single Ladies (sadly).**

*Does anyone have any allergies?*

*I'm sorry? Who is this?*

I snorted at Rachel's reply. _Of course._*This is Claudia, the crazy chick from Yellowstone that forced you into dinner with her... I just wanted to know if anyone had any preferences. I was thinking of inviting you guys to our family BBQ.*

*My fathers would like to know when and where.*

I texted her the date and address.

*I must inform you that I am a vegetarian. I would be more than glad to my own meal.*

*Vegetarian. Nice. Don't worry about that, I have it covered. You never answered my question about allergies.*

*No. No one has any allergies.*

*Wonderful! I'll see you at the BBQ, my lady. I congratulate you on your superior spelling and grammar.*

"Who are you texting?" Noah asked me, leaning over me to try and see my phone screen.

I poked him in the ribs. "None of you business. Watch the movie."

_'I can't believe that just fucking happened!'_

_'Is it dead?'_

_Shit. I missed my favorite part of the movie!_

*****

I was looking at a large array of barbeque sauces in disgust. "How do people eat this?" I asked the empty aisle. I reached for a random bottle when a voice startled me.

"Most people eat it on steaks and hamburgers, really I suppose any meat would do."

"JC!" I jumped in fright and dropped the bottle to the ground. I turned to see Rachel leaning against a cart. "You scared the crap out of me."

I was currently shopping at a grocery store for the barbeque. I had become particularly stumped when it came to the sauce, because I think it's disgusting and no one was very specific about what they wanted.

Rachel laughed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you. I merely thought that since I spotted you I could ask you about what would be appropiate to bring to your barbeque."

"Oh. Well you're guests, so you don't—"

Rachel cut me off. "My fathers always say to never come to a party empty handed."

"Right." I said. "You could bring dessert, if you wanted, like a pie or something."

"Hey, Claud," Noah's voice started from the end of the aisle. "I know you're a total lesbo, but I didn't know that you're a hippy too." Noah was engrossed in the ingredients label of the veggie burgers I had sent him after.

I ignored his insult and started to introduce him to Rachel. "Noah, I'd like you to meet Rachel—"

"Berry." He hissed.

"Puck." Rachel snapped.

"Puck?" My eyes shot between Rachel and Noah. They were glaring at each other. Noah was currently gripping the box of veggie burgers so tightly it was disfiguring the box. I pulled it from his grip.

"What are you doing here?" He growled. His hands were fisted at his sides and the blood vessel in his forehead was throbbing ominously.

"I could ask you the same thing." Rachel replied.

"I'm going to ask. What the hell is happening right now?" I asked, my confusion growing exponentially.

Rachel sucked in a breath and explained, "Puck, I'm sorry, Noah and I go to school at William McKinley together in Ohio."

"Yeah." Noah supplied.

"Awesome." I said.

"I'm afraid that that is not the case, Claudia. As you can see, Pu—Noah and I share a certain animosity towards each other." Rachel said, oblivious to my sarcasm.

"I can see that." I was on the verge of laughing. This would be funny when it wasn't happening. "I guess what I'm trying to say is _why_?"

"Noah and I are simply from different parts of our school's hierarchy that do not associate well."

"Yeah." Noah repeated.

"Okay. Noah," I patted his shoulder, "I want you to go across the street to GameStop and I'll pick you up when I'm done shopping. Rachel and I are going to talk about girl things like feelings and our vaginas, okay?"

Noah glared once more at Rachel, turned on his heel, and walked away.

Rachel watched him walk away, worry etched on her face. "He's not going to do something regrettable, is he?"

I looked over my shoulder as Noah's retreating form reached the end of the aisle. "No, he'll be fine." I looked down at the shopping list in my hands and asked, "What's this nonsense about hierarchy?"

"In Lima, our school works on a certain social hierarchy; decided by your participation in athletic, academic, or artistic pursuits." She calmly explained.

"So, what you're telling me is that you stereotype each other into little boxes, and then you try to kill the other boxes with your attitudes towards each other." I said as I grabbed items from my list. "That sounds like a bad movie, or an equally awful TV show."

"It's not like that all, Claudia. We simple exist on different planes and they do not compliment each other."

"Okay. So. I think what you're trying to say is that all of the guys who play sports only get along with the _other_ guys who play sports, and it's the same thing with academics and and arts, right?" I asked. I crossed the last item off of my list. We had reached the back of the store, we turned around and headed for the registers.

"Yes."

"No offense to your school or anything, but that's really stupid. I'm sure if you tried even a little bit you'd be surprised at how well 'jocks' and 'nerds' get along." Rachel and I reached the registers and I started placing everything on it. "I have these." I told the cashier, handing her half a dozen re-useable bags.

"I mean to sound patronizing, Claudia, but it's not that easy." She said, a little offended I noticed.

"I never said it was, Rachel." I said as I started grabbing bags full of groceries and putting them in the cart.

"Then how do you know it would work?" she blanched.

I swiped my debit card through the deal. _What the hell is the thing called, anyways?_ "It works here." I said, not looking at her. "It's messy as hell and crazy and it hurts sometimes, but it's a million times better than hating someone with out even knowing them."

I waved at the kid pushing carts from the parking lot into the building. He waved back and Rachel gave me a funny look.

"Claudia?"

"Yeah Rachel?" I said, locating my car.

"Did you get those veggie burgers for me?" She asked.

I smiled at her. "Yeah. Those are yours. Did I get the wrong kind?" I asked as I opened the trunk and placed the bags inside.

"No. I just wanted to say thank you." She was grinding the toe of her trainers into the asphalt.

"So you're coming?"

"Of course I'm coming, my fathers would never allow me to be miss the opportunity for a friendship." She said shyly.

"Oh, Rachel. You make me laugh." I chuckled and closed the trunk.


	4. BBQ with the Custer Clan

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**A/N: Very few of you will notice, but I have changed the name of the main character from Conny to Claudia. I was thinking about it and Claudia just _fits_ better. I hope it doesn't cause too much confusion.**

"I swear on all things holy, if you make a mess in here I will burn your clothes in your sleep." I warned Cole. He was holding a knife in his hand about to spread jelly over a piece of toast.

"I haven't even done anything!" He defended.

"I don't care. I know you. You're a teenage boy and you think about two things; food and sex. If you don't clean up after yourself I will hurt you." Cole mumbled something under his breath that sound suspiciously like "crazy bitch."

I had been cleaning for five hours. No one was going to mess up my plan.

_Clean the house while Mom, Dani, and Elisa were in Casper._

_Tell Mom about Rachel and her dad's coming to the BBQ._

_Force Noah into not acting like an idiot about Rachel._

_Clean everything again._

_Ten year olds could be such a downer sometimes._ I thought to myself as I pulled the carpet cleaner from the closet.

*****

"Claud, I can't. You don't understand." Noah tried.

"No, I don't and I really don't care, Noah." I said.

Noah and I were currently arguing over Rachel as I was cleaning the dishes,again.

"Claud, it's different in Ohio. It's like around here—"

"I don't care what it's like there. This is here." I pushed my sud soaked hand into his chest.

"I know that, Claud." he said guiltily.

"Then act like it." I said and continued scrubbing. Noah sighed and started rinsing he dishes in the sink next to me. "Thanks." I said. Noah pouted at me, but continued rinsing.

*****

Rachel and her fathers were going to arrive any minute and Mom was fusing over the how the plates were arranged on the table.

"Mom. They're gay, not OCD, and even if they were they would change it all anyways."

"I'm sorry Claudia, but when you invite people over with out telling me I tend to get a little—"

"Anal?" I supplied.

"No. Concerned. I don't want them to think we're uncivilized."

I laughed. I think she was worried because we lived in a trailer home. I didn't really see the problem. It was a really nice place. It's clean and everything works. "Don't worry. I already told Noah to behave and told Dani that if she was good I would take her on a special 'Girl's Day' just me and her."

Mom relaxed a little bit, until Rachel and her fathers were at the gate.

"I don't have any problems with the fact the you're gay."

"Okay. Thank you. I'm sure they're glad to know that. Mom. This is Nathan, and this is Anthony." I introduced. "I met them and their daughter, Rachel, in Yellowstone. This is my mother, Madonna. And that's Noah and Cole at the grill." I pointed in their direction. They raised their hands in a halfhearted greeting.

"It's nice to meet you." Mom said.

"It's nice to meet you too, Madonna." Nathan said.

"Well, this is going brilliant so far." I said. Sarcasm edging my voice. "I'm going to get something to drink, does anyone want anything?" I asked.

"I need a beer." Noah called from the grill, where he was dutifully flipping burgers.

"Funny, Noah." Mom said.

Elisa walked out from the house with Dani. "Eli, come meet my new friends." I said, waving them over. "This is Nathan and Anthony. They're from Lima too."

"Nice to meet you. I'm Elisa."

"And I'm Dani." Dani added from Eli's side.

I let them talk and walked to where Rachel was standing behind her fathers, holding a pie. "Hey Rachel, how's it going?"

"Honestly, I have been much better. This feels unbelievably awkward to me. I brought pie like you suggested."

The adults laughed about something and I smiled. "Don't worry about it Rachel. Everyone loves pie. Come inside with me and get something to drink." I said and pulled her into the house.

**(Noah)**

I watched as Claud dragged Berry into the house. _So much for the best summer ever. The way things are going Berry is gonna be around all summer._ I took a few burgers off of grill and put them on a plate. "Hey, Cole. Take these inside?" I asked. He stood up from his chair and grabbed the plate from my hands. "Bring that back." I told him as he reached the steps.

"Noah? Can I help you barbeque?"

I looked down at Dani pulling on the fabric of my jeans. "No way, twerp. This is man's work. Go help Claud in the kitchen." I said.

"Fine." Dani punched me in the back of my knee and ran into the house.

"Brat." I spat under my breath and continued to flip burgers and roll hot dogs.

"That's some mighty fine grilling, son." I heard a voice say.

I turned and saw one of Berry's dads admiring the food on the grill, the black one. "Thanks." I said. "I'm Noah." I put out my hand.

"Anthony." He said and shook my hand. "You know, it's too bad you folks are leaving so soon, otherwise we could grill up some steaks sometime."

"Actually, I'm staying for the rest of the summer." I said as I flipped a few more burgers.

"Really? Your mother said you folks were headed out Sunday."

"Here." Cole handed me the plate.

"Thanks, man." I started putting more burgers and a few hotdogs on the plate. "Cole, this Anthony, Rachel's dad."

"Hi." Cole said and shook Anthony's hand.

"Tell me, Noah. Where does someone get burgers as fine looking as those?" Anthony asked.

"This guy Claud knows, Ted. His father owns Clark's, the meat house across town."

When I met him he was wearing a Dragon Ball shirt and a Sonic the Hedgehog jacket. We played Wii for awhile, and he kept calling Claud 'G.' Claud kept up his little game and called him 'Homie.' I actually liked the guy, as weird as he was, he had gotten me a summer job at the meat house after all.

"Hey! Guys, come on. It's time to eat." Claud called from the doorway.


	5. Becoming Friends

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

Dinner was going pretty fucking good, if you asked me. Cole was obviously uncomfortable with Rachel's dads, but he was holding his tongue, thank God. Noah hadn't said one word to Rachel, and that was ok. Mom, Eli, and 'The Dad's' as I called them were getting along famously. Dani had latched onto Rachel like nobodies business. I thought it was pretty cute.

By the time dessert had rolled around I was feeling good about the whole deal. Until...

"So Noah, you and Rachel go to school together in Lima?" Mom asked.

A look of horror crossed Noah's face before it settled into practiced disinterest. Rachel glanced at Noah like she needed his permission to speak.

When Noah didn't do anything Rachel squared her shoulders and answered. "Yes, Madonna. Unfortunately, Noah and I do not interact often due to the fact that we do not participate in the same extracurricular activities. I participate mainly in theatre and choir."

"How interesting." Mom said.

"Yeah, it's fascinating." I heard Noah say under his breath from where he sat next to me.

"Claudia does theatre too. She was in Into the Woods." Mom said proudly.

"Really?" Rachel eyed me. "What role?"

"Granny. I like theatre, but it doesn't like me. I prefer Speech."

"I'm on the debate team as well." She said.

"What events?" I asked.

"Drama."

"You know what I don't understand about Drama? Everyone seems it's the most God awful event, but I really like it. If it's a really bad piece you don't have to pretend to laugh like you do in Humor." I felt the tension between Rachel and Noah dissipate as I talked.

******

Rachel and The Dad's had left about an hour ago. Noah and I were putting away the left-overs.

"Thanks for not being a jerk tonight tonight, Noah." I said as I put the leftover pie in the fridge.

"Thanks for not forcing me to talk to Rachel." he replied.

"Yeah. What was that anyways?"

"You know." He said.

"No, Noah, I don't. Rachel tried to feed me some bull about social hierarchies, but I have a hard time believing that any of it's real..."

He sighed. "Back in Ohio I have a rep to protect, but in Wyoming I don't have to and I can be the real me. Rachel just being here, sort of threatens all of it. Like, if she goes back to Lima and tells people that I'm not the Puck in Wyoming, then it might ruin my rep."

I smiled sadly at Noah, "If you aren't yourself all of the time, then is that who you really are?"

*****

"Hello?" The voice on the other end of the phone questioned.

"Hey Rachel. I'm going to lunch and I was wondering if you wanted to come. I'll buy."

"Will Noah be attending?"

"No. He has work."

"Well, I am feeling rather peckish."

"Cool, do you need a ride?"

"No, thank you. Daddy is going into town right now. Should I meet you somewhere?"

"Yeah, JB's. It's on Federal. You can't miss it."

"I will be there shortly."

*****

Rachel was trying to explain Show Choir to me when my phone started ringing.

"Sorry, Rachel. Do you mind?" I asked.

"Not at all." She said.

It was a text from Noah. *where u ?*

*I'm at lunch. What do you want?*

"Okay, so you sing random songs with dancing and costumes?"

"Yes. It's very rewarding."

"It sounds like you're trying to be a musical. Do you ever start singing and dancing in the hallways or during class?"

*where ? i'm starving.*

*I'm at JB's, Noah.*

"No. I'm afraid that would garner unwanted attention, none of which I want or need." She said.

*tits. ted & i are headed over there now.*

**(Noah)**

Ted and I walked through the doors of JB's and I spotted Claud right away. I motioned Ted towards the booth she was sitting at and slid in next to her before I noticed Rachel. She looked as surprised to see me as I was to see her.

"Finally!" Claud said. "We've been waiting forever for you guys. Ted, this is Rachel Berry. Rachel, this is my friend Ted. He works at the meat house with Noah."

"Yes. Daddy was explaining that your father owns it?" Rachel smiled at Ted.

He sat down nervously next to Rachel. "Yeah."

Claud was avoiding my gaze as I glared at her. "Not even a warning?" I whispered.

"You wouldn't have come." She whispered back.

The waitress appeared with Rachel and Claud's food. She didn't look too happy to see me and Ted, but she forced her smile and took our orders. Claud carried the conversation as Rachel picked at her salad.

I started to think about what Claud had said last night. _If you aren't yourself all of the time, then is that who you really are? _I thought about why I could be friends with all of Claud's friends, but not with Rachel. _If Rachel was one of Claud's friends, I would probably like her, but she's from Lima and she could fuck up my rep._ I thought about Claud's friends, about how different they were from me.

John's a skinny blond kid. He's a techie and he knows all kinds of cool shit, like how to build a set of stairs, and he always has something to destroy when he's around. He's pretty good with computers too. He fixed my iPod last summer and helped when my mom wanted a new laptop.

Savanna's this crazy Mexican chick Claud has know since, like, middle school. She never stops talking. Cole doesn't like her very much, but I think she's kind of funny. Savanna's really easy to rile up and she always has a comeback. She's a book worm, but she always has a cool opinion about shit.

Amanda is Savanna's sister. She visits during the summer like I do. Their mother died a few years ago and their father was never even in the picture, so she lives with her aunt a few hours away in Buffalo. She's different from Savanna in almost every way, but they try really hard to be friends. Amanda is more modern and can relate better to people our age.

Andee is Claud's weirdest friend. She's a lesbian and a vegetarian. I have a really hard time understanding her. She spews a lot gibberish. She's ok though, I guess. I think Claud has a crush on her, because she always insists that Andee comes along when we hang out.

The truth was if we were in Ohio right now I wouldn't give the kids a second look and probably hate them as much as I hate Rachel. _Do you really hate Rachel? I mean, she's nuts and stuff. She doesn't talk like a normal person, but you don't even know her..._

"Earth to Noah." Claud snapped her fingers in my face.

"Knock it off." I pushed hand away from my face. I looked down and noticed that my food had magically appeared in front of me. Ted was already halfway though his burger. I took a huge bite out of my bacon cheeseburger and chewed, wondering when I had become such a girl.

**(Rachel)**

Claudia was a mystery to me. She had somehow wiggled her way into my life. If you had told me that I would be dancing in the living room of the pretty girl hitting on me at Old Faithful a week ago I would have laughed in your face.

_Ain't got no money in my pocket_

_but I'm already he-re. And now_

_the dudes are linin' up cause_

_they hear we got swagger._

_But we kick 'em to the curb_

_unless they look like McJagger._

We jumped around to the beat of the music, our arms flailing in the air.

_I'm talking 'bout e'rybody getting' _

_crunk, crunk._

_Boys tryin' to touch my_

_junk, junk._

_Gonna smack 'em if they getting' too_

_drunk, drunk._

Claudia flopped down on her couch when the song ended. "You know, I promised Dani a special day for just me and her if she behaved at the barbeque the other day. I think she would really like it if you came." She said, her head resting against the couch.

"Dani is a very sweet girl and I would be proud to be a part of her special day, but only if she wanted me to be." I said, following her example and sitting on the couch carelessly.

The front door opened and Noah's mother, Elisa, Madonna, Claudia's mother, and Dani entered. "Speak of the devil." Claudia noted.

"Hi, Claudia. Hi, Rachel." Dani greeted. She scrambled onto Claudia's lap and began to play with her hair.

"What are you girls up to?" Elisa asked from the kitchen.

"We just got back from lunch with Noah and Ted." Claudia replied.

"Us too." Dani said

"Really? What a coincidence, we all had lunch at lunch time; and we all had lunch with Noah and Ted." Claudia teased.

"Mom and Aunty and Me—"

"I." Claudia corrected.

"I! didn't have lunch with Noah and Ted. We just had lunch!" Dani cried.

"I know silly, I was just teasing."

"We're still having our special day tomorrow aren't we?" Dani asked.

"Of course we are, and I was thinking, if Rachel wanted to, she could come to?" Claudia asked.

Dani's eyes grew wide and she turned to me. "Do you want to come on my special day with Claudia. I really want you to. It would be so much fun!"

I smiled my biggest smile. "How can I say no when you ask it like that?"


	6. I'm Always Right

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**A/N: I know this chapter is horribly short, but it's late and I wanted to post something before I went to bed. Reviews are love!**

Dani stirred in my arms as I opened the door to the house. It had been a long day. I had woken Dani up 7, picked up Rachel at the Baltes' ranch, and headed out of town. We had eaten breakfast at a little diner in Shoshoni and headed to Thermopolis. After swimming, we ate lunch at A&W, and then we went bowling. Dani wanted to go to the dinosaur museum. I bought her a piece of fool's gold from the gift shop.

It was only 8, but Dani was _out_ for the night. I had dropped Rachel back off at the Baltes'. I waved to The Dads as Rachel walked to the door.

"How was Girls Day?" Eli asked

"It was awesome. Dani had so much fun. She absolutely adores Rachel. She wants to be her when she grows up."

"I thought she wanted to be you?"

"She did, but I'm going to be a teacher when I grow up, Rachel's going to be a Broadway star." I laughed.

I set Dani in the nest she had made on the floor of Mom's room where she and Eli slept.

"What are you and Noah doing tonight?" Eli asked as I settled on the couch.

"I'm not doing anything." I said." I'll be in bed by nine." I yawned to prove my point. "What are you and Mom up to?"

"Oh. We're going to order pizza and watch a movie." She said. "Would you like to join us?"

"More than you know."

**(Noah)**

Claud, Madonna, and my mom were crying. _The Notebook_ flashed across the screen. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a slice of pizza from a box. _Girls. _Cole had his eyes glued to the computer in the kitchen.

"Grab me a piece, will you?" Claudia asked, her tears already drying.

I grabbed a piece of pepperoni and sat next to Claud, handing her her pizza.

"I just wanted you to know, I'm this close to getting in Rachel's pants." Claud whispered to me.

"I don't believe you."

"You're jealous because I can and you _can't_. Admit it, if you didn't know it was Rachel Berry you would be all over her." Claud had a smug smile on her lips as she stared at the TV screen.

I grunted. Claud was so weird sometimes.

The movie finished and and Mom shuffled back to her room and Madonna moved into Cole's room. Claud brought out a huge pile of blankets from her room and tossed them in my face. I threw a pillow back at her.

"Sweet dreams, cousin." She said as she tossed the pillow back into my face.

I winked at her, turned the TV off, and laid down on the couch.

_I felt her body on top of me before I saw her. She was wearing my football jersey, her falling around her shoulders softly._

"_Rachel?" She smiled and bit her lip. "What are you doing here?" I asked._

"_You asked me to be here, Noah. You said it was important." She said, her voice husky._

"_I said that?" She nodded. I was having a hard time concentrating, her thighs were warm against my sides, and her hair looked so soft. She bit her lip again. "Fuck it." I said and swinging my arm around her shoulder and pulling her lips to mine._

_I moaned at the sensation of her body against mine._

"Noah?"

"mmmMmm."

"Noah, are you ok?"

"Wha?"

"What were you dreaming about?" I could hear the smirk in her voice.

"Huh? Nothing."

"You sure? You were making some serious happy noises. Was it Angelina Jolie? Brad Pitt? It was Brad Pitt, wasn't it?"

"Shut up, Claudia."


	7. Night Of My Life

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**A/N: Reviews are love!**

"Goodbye, Dani. I'll miss you so much." I squeezed Dani tight and kissed her cheek.

"Goodbye, Claudia. Thank you for our Girl's Day." She pouted. "Why don't you ever come to where we live?"

I smiled at her wide eyes. "Maybe I will, someday."

We all stood at the door as Dani and Eli got into their rented car and drove away into the sunrise. I yawned and slapped Noah in his stomach. "Dude," I said as he rubbed his abs, "We were going start running in the mornings, remember?"

"Do we have to start now? Can it wait until tomorrow?" He whined.

"No. Get your shit together, we're going."

Half an hour later Noah and I were jogging side by side, listening to our iPods. A fanny pack bounced against my butt. Noah had tried to make fun of it, until I slipped our water bottles inside. We had been jogging for maybe a mile when Noah signaled me to stop.

"What?" I handed him his water bottle and opened my own.

"I'm so out of shape." He huffed.

"No joke. You're supposed to be a jock. Shouldn't you be better at this?" I asked, smirking.

"Shouldn't you, you know, suck it?"

I laughed and punched Noah in the arm. "We're going to the movies. You coming?"

"Who's going?"

"Savanna and Amanda, Ted, John. I texted everybody, but you know how my friends are."

"Flighty." Noah supplied.

I nodded. "Let's go. I got shit do."

**(Rachel)**

I was weary of Claudia's invitation to the movie theatre. I was aware that Noah would be attending and I was afraid that my presence would make him uncomfortable. I politely declined, but Claudia insisted. After finally relenting, she picked me up in a small silver car. As I was walking to her car, Noah had gotten out of the front seat and placed himself in the rear of the car.

When I entered the car Noah and Claudia were laughing. Noah nodded in greeting at me, his smile never leaving his face. Claudia's car smelled like vanilla. She greeted me happily and waved to my fathers as she left the drive-way. Noah had surprised me, by being so civil and I hardly spoke as Claudia told me a story about sneaking into a hotel to swim in it's pool and being chased out by it's staff.

Claudia introduced me to her friends: Ted was the young man wearing a Sonic jacket, Savanna talked more than I do and at a much faster pace. Her younger sister, Amanda, had very long hair and liked to flirt with the boys to upset Savanna, John was very tall and liked to talk about the internet and video games. Molly was a very agreeable young lady who seemed to come off kind of dumb, and Austin was her boyfriend.

After the movie we had stood around in the parking lot behind the theatre and talked for almost an hour before we ended up at Claudia's house. After a rushed conversation I convinced Dad to allow me to stay with Claudia at her home for the night. We had watched another movie, but I missed most of it because we all talked so much. Every now and then we would stop the movie altogether and stand in the kitchen and talk.

We never talked about the same thing for more than a minute or two before we moved onto another random talk. We discussed our preference in pillows, men, women, dogs, food, movies. No subject was untouchable and it seemed as though every topic was randomly connected to the next. We talked about serious things, like our morals, and we talked about silly things, like our favorite toys as children.

Before I knew it, it was one o' clock in the morning. Austin and Molly had left hours ago. We all piled into Claudia's car and headed to the 24-hour Wal-Mart. I was squished next to Amanda and John. Noah had called 'shotgun.'

John and Ted had held clothes for Amanda and Claudia as they ransacked rack after rack of clothing. We watched as they modeled clothes, jewelry and shoes. By 3 am we had left with Amanda and Claudia throwing bags full of clothes and movies into her trunk.

We were desperately hungry, but it appeared that every fast-food restaurant was closed at such an indecent hour. Ted remembered that the casinos were open. Branding him a genius Claudia drove to the other side of town.

I had never been to a casino before. It was very bright and very noisy and it was practically empty. I followed Claudia and ordered my food. When the word cheeseburger escaped my mouth, Claudia raised her eyebrows and said, "Vegetarian?"

"I was hoping it would deter you from inviting me to your barbeque." I choked out. "I appreciate your effort to make me feel comfortable and to befriend me and I apologise for lying to you."

She laughed. "Apology accepted, but don't do it again."

By four o' clock we decided to stay up for the rest of the night. Noah and Claudia left to play on the slot machines even thought they were only 17. I had tried to warn them, but they ignored my me and said that they did it all the time and they haven't been caught yet.

While they were gone Ted, Amanda, John, Savanna, and I talked. We talked about movies, most of which I haven't seen, and television, none of which I watch, and theatre, finally broaching a topic I could handle. When Claudia and Noah returned they were each a hundred dollars richer.

**(Claudia)**

"This is honestly the most fun I have ever had in my entire life." Rachel sighed, sleep grabbing hold of her.

Rachel and I were laying under a blanket in my living room. Unfortunately we were both fully clothed, as was every person laying on my living room floor. I had left a note for Mom in the bathroom so she wouldn't be surprised by six teenagers on the floor. This was a common occurrence for the past few summers since I had gotten my own car.

"The most fun of your entire life? What do you do with your friends in Lima?" I asked.

"I don't have any friends in Lima." 'Lima' was muffled because she had yawned. When I tried to question her further I realised she had fallen asleep.

_No friends? _Was my last thought as I drifted to sleep, the sunrise greeting my tired eyes.

**(Noah)**

Some one was shoving me against the couch. I grunted and pushed them away from me.

"Noah?" A voice said. "We have to be at work in twenty minutes." it said.

"Five more minutes." I bargained.

"Go ahead, Ted. I'll get him up." Claud's voice said.

I heard Ted shuffle out the door and felt Claud sit down on the couch. She rubbed my shoulder and cooed, "Noah, it's time to get, cousin. If you lose this job I'll kick your ass into next week and back. I'm not paying for your plane ticket home."

I grumbled incoherently and turned over. "Time is it?" I rubbed the sleep from my eyes.

"It's 8:43. Get your ass up and bring home the bacon. Literally, I want some for breakfast Thursday. Please?" She added as an after thought.

I felt her get up from the couch and walk to where Berry was laying on the floor. I heard her mumble something to her and then Berry shuffle into a sitting position. I looked over at Berry. Her hair was mussed into a pile on top of her head, her make-up was smeared around her eyes, and she had a crease from her pillow on her cheek. She looked so normal, I almost forgot I hated her.

Claud herded us into her car after I changed my shirt. I noticed Berry staring at me while I rummaged through my clothes, shirtless. One of the perks of living in someone's front room for the summer, I guess.

Claud has some job at a clothing store across town, Maurices, I think. She dropped me off at the meat house and drove away with a quick nod.

I didn't get to do anything cool, like cut any of the meats, I just loaded the delivery truck. It was hard work but I got paid well. I saved most of my check for a plane ticket home, but I still had a little left over every week for food and stuff. Every once and a while Claud and I would go out to the casino win a couple of bucks. Last night had been a really lucky night.

Last night had been really weird.

"_I don't know why you had to invite Berry." I said, crossing my arms and looking out the window._

"_I don't know if you know this," she said, "but I'm kind of friends with her."_

"_Still."_

"_Noah, why don't you do what I do when I have to be around someone I don't like? Leave it at the door." She shrugged._

_'What?"_

"_You know, just leave it behind. Every time they do something to annoy you and you think about punching their stupid face in" she said, her voice growing tight and her hands gripping the steering wheel tightly, "just think, _'No, it's okay. It won't do any good to think like that.' _and move on." She released the steering wheel from her death grip._

"_That works?" I said, disbelieving._

"_It works." She said turning into the drive way of the Turpin Meadow Ranch. "No homo." She added as I stepped out of the car and moved to the back seat._

_I laughed and even managed to keep a smile on my face as I nodded at Berry in greeting._

It worked. I was able to make it through the entire night with being rude to Berry once.


	8. One of Those Times We Did Things

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did Mark Salling wouldn't even know what a shirt was. Haha.**

Another successful morning of running and Noah and I had made it at least a mile and a half before he made us stop.

"You're getting better at this cousin." I said as I handed him his water bottle. He just eyeballed me and took a sip from his bottle. "I was thinking that we should go camping."

"Who?"

"Everyone. It would be fun, and just overnight."

"Yeah. I guess."

*****

I went through my mental list of camping supplies as every one talked in my yard. It was already 5 o' clock and we just about to leave from my yard. I called to John and we all piled into his car and mine. It was an half hour drive out to the lake were we would be camping.

We pulled up to a perfect camping spot. John and I set up the tent while Noah and Amanda fought while starting the fire. He was insisting it was a man job, while Amanda was calling him an idiot and telling him he was doing it wrong.

"Maybe we should use something flammable on the wood to start the fire." Rachel suggested.

"There, you see? Rachel has a good idea." Savanna agreed, her arms waving wildly in the air has she talked.

Rachel smiled at the compliment and shifted on her feet. I thought for a moment about what she had said the other night when we were falling asleep on the floor. _I don't have any friends in Lima._

I banished the thought when Savanna made a joke about Noah's incompetence and took the lighter from his hand.

**(Rachel)**

I was unaware that camping could be such a fulfilling experience. After John and Noah were finally able to start a fire, Claudia and Savanna began to pull branches from a nearby tree. I protested at first, but Amanda quieted my concerns when she explained the branches were 'pokers' and the food Claudia had supplied would be cooked on them. Noah was kind enough to whittle the end of a branch to a sharp tip for me.

After consuming copious amounts of hotdogs, S'mores, and soda, we began to play a ridiculous game called 'Never Have I Ever.' It started innocent enough, but it quickly turned sexual when no one was able to supply anything exciting.

Noah continually lost, while Ted and I both managed to keep at least five fingers up by the end of each game. I was taken back by Claudia's _associations_ with other woman. The thought of her with other women made me feel slightly flustered.

The moon was high in the sky and we had all lapsed into a comfortable silence.

"Let's go skinny dipping." Noah said.

Claudia laughed.

Amanda popped her head up from where it was resting on Ted's shoulder and said. "No, we really should. It would be fun!"

"No. It wouldn't be fun." Savanna retorted. "I'm not getting naked in front of you pervs."

"I'll do it." said John.

"Of course you would, white boy." Claudia laughed. "I'll go swimming, but I'm not getting naked."

"I'll go too." I said.

Noah shot me a disbelieving look and then raised his eyebrows suggestively. I frowned at him and stood.

"Let's go." Claudia said and stood as well.

**(Noah)**

John, Ted, and myself stood at the edge of the lake in our boxers. The girls had already stripped to their bras and panties and had dove into the lake. I had tried not to stare as Berry undressed and folded her clothes neatly, but it seemed wrong (so wrong it was right) that someone so short could have such long legs. She had whimpered when she entered the cold water.

We watched as they waded slowly into the water. They each exclaimed loudly and laughed when the water reached their _lady parts_, and once again when it crested their chests. I tried unsuccessfully not to think about Berry.

"Come on, guys! Don't be such girls!" Claudia called from where she tread water, maybe ten feet off shore.

Ted, John , and I looked at each other and shook our heads. "No way!" I called back. "It's too cold!"

"Ted." Amanda called. Her voice was husky. She tilted her head and curled her finger in a 'come hither' gesture. "Come here."

Ted's eyes got wide as he looked warily at Amanda and then the water.

The girls laughed. "Don't tease him Amanda, he might take you seriously." Savanna warned.

"Fuck this pussy shit." I said. I stormed into the lake, clenching my teeth and hissing as my body reacted to the freezing _as balls_ water. I heard Ted and John follow hastily behind me, with similar reactions.

Claudia laughed. "How's it feel?" she asked.

"It's fucking freezing." I said.

Claudia laughed again and splashed water in my face.

I cried out in surprise and shoved water back towards her, but she slipped under the water and the splash hit Berry square in the face. She gasped in surprise as the cold water doused her face. I waited for her to start screaming, but she only smiled and splashed back.

Twenty minutes later, we stepped back onto the coarse sand on the lake's edge soaked and out of breath. The girls changed into dry clothes and Ted and John and I stood around the fire in our boxers. When mine were less wet I pulled my pants back on.

"My god, John, you are _white._" Claudia said as returned to the fire and rummaged though the cooler.

John slapped a goofy grin on his face and stuck a Captain Morgan pose. He looked ridiculous with his farmers tan.

**(Claudia)**

I snuggled in between Noah and Rachel when we finally let the fire burn down to embers and headed for the tent. It was pretty close fit, after all, we were shoving seven people into a five person tent.

I liked it better that way. There was less open space and it was easier for me to stay warm.

"I'm going to snuggle with you." I warned.

"Fine, but hands off the junk." Noah said.

"Shut up, Noah. I was talking to _Rachel_." I said.

"Oh." Rachel said, surprised. 'I suppose that's alright."

"Good." I said and threw my arm around her, snuggling close.

**(Rachel)**

The first thing I was aware of was the arm around my waist. _Claudia obviously has no problem with the close proximity, _I thought. The second was the much larger hand that was resting against my stomach. _Noah_. I realised in horror. Third, was that my fingers were intertwined with those of the larger hand. I froze in fear.

"Noah, I swear to God, that better be a flashlight in your pocket."

The fingers slipped from mine as Noah adjusted himself away from Claudia.

"Sorry cus. I meant to put that in my bag." I could _hear_ the smirk in his voice.

I heard Savanna laugh, then John snicker, then fairly soon the entire tent was shaking with laughter.


	9. Take It

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did Mark Salling wouldn't even know what a shirt was. Haha.**

**A/N: Sometimes I think I'm really clever, but I'm not really that clever. So I need you to tell me if I'm funny, and more importantly, what's funny. Please. It would make my day. Reviews are love!**

"Claud, hurry it up. We have to be at Ted's in 15 minutes." Noah said, leaning in the doorway to my bedroom.

"Dude, relax." I said. "We're not in any hurry."

"I'll leave you." He threatened.

"You will not. It's my car, Noah."

"Hurry!"

I ignored him and opened my cell phone. I dialed a number and waited for it to pick up.

"Hello?" the voice on the other end questioned.

"Hey Rachel, are you ready to go?"

"I'm afraid I will not be prepared for approximately 20 minutes." She replied.

"That's cool. We haven't even left yet." I said. "We're leaving right now." I said to both Rachel and Noah, who was sitting on the couch and watching Cole play UFC on his XBox 360. "You'll be ready to go by the time we get there?"

"I suppose I will have to be."

I said goodbye and closed my phone before opening it again and sending a text to Ted.

*We're going to get Rachel and head to your house. See you then Homie.*

**(Rachel)**

Never one to partake in adolescent activities such as video games I was pleasantly astounded by the sheer joy I had in partaking in the events currently occurring in Ted's home.

"No!" Ted cried punching the air. "You don't even need any technique."

Claudia was laughing hysterically and swinging her arms enthusiastically as she played Boxing on Ted's Wii. Ted's Mii fell to the floor and he began pushing buttons frantically and waving his controller in the air trying to revive himself. When the screen announced 'KO' Claudia threw her arms in the air and whooped loudly in triumph.

"Come on Rachel, it's your turn to face my wrath." Claudia motioned for me to stand up.

"You seem extremely confident in your ability to win this game." I replied as I took the controller from Ted and faced the screen,

"Your stunning vocabulary isn't going to help you win." Claudia said.

"Stunning isn't the word I would use." Noah said from where he sat on the couch, eating cereal.

"And how would you describe my vocabulary, Noah?" I asked curtly.

"Pointless." Noah snorted.

"I think Rachel has a wonderful vocabulary." Ted said enthusiastically.

"Thank you, Ted. I appreciate your exuberance."

"You're welcome, Rachel."

Claudia waved her Wii controller at me and said, "Come on, Rachel. I need to kick your ass at this game."

**(Noah)**

I tried to ignore the way Berry's ass looked in her jeans, possibly better than when she wore her ridiculously short skirts or even those shorts from Yellowstone. I tried to ignore the tiny grunts she made as she punched the air. I tried not to notice the exposed skin that appeared when she leaned back to block Claudia's punches in the game.

I couldn't ignore the way her hair bounced when she jumped up and down after winning, or the way her face flushed after exerting herself like that. _The hell, Puckerman? Did you grow a vagina in your sleep last night? You are not interested in Berry. It won't happen._

Tired of playing Wii, Ted and I started playing _Dead Space_ on his PS3. Rachel whimpered every time I stomped a alien zombie. Eventually Claudia got tired of hearing it and made us play a different game.

Ted put Call of Duty 4. Waiting for a lecture about gratuitous violence from Berry, I set up the game for four players. When nothing came I turned to face her. "You've got nothing to say?" I asked.

"I'm not sure I understand, Noah."

"You're not going to lecture us about the evils of unnecessary violence in video games?" I asked incredulously.

"No, Noah." Berry said primly as she tugged on the hem of her shirt. "In reality, studies suggest that violent video games deter actual violence."

I scoffed and turned back to the TV. We each set up profiles for the game and started playing. Ted and I kicked major ass. I won the first three rounds, Ted always a close second.

Claud never really played video games and Berry was completely clueless. Ted and I stopped to teach them the basics and got back to kicking ass. I stood behind Berry as she tried to turn and shoot me, but I would just crouch and she would miss me.

"Take that, you son of a bitch." She said as she shot me in the head.

Claudia laughed. I was floored. Not only had Berry killed me, she had insulted me.

**(Claudia)**

"Goodnight Rachel!" I called. "I'll call you tomorrow, maybe we can have dinner or something."

Rachel raised her arm in acknowledgment as she walked to the front door of the Baltes' house on their ranch.

Noah flopped unceremoniously into the front seat. I waited for him to buckle his beat belt before he moved. "Let's move it, cousin. I have shit to do."

"If you're talking about _Top Gear_, we have DVR."

"No, I'm talking about _Supernatural_." He replied.

"Oh my God, you're right!" I said and pressed the brakes to change gears. "Wait. We're not moving until you stop being an idiot and put your seat-belt on."

"What?" Noah frowned. "Come on Claud, it'll be fine."

"Nope. I'm not moving till you get some brains in your head." I looked out the windshield.

Noah mumbled and buckled his seat-belt. I just smiled at his childishness and put the car in gear.

"I had fun tonight." I said, making conversation.

"Yeah. It would have been more fun if you hadn't invited Berry." he pouted.

"Oh, whatever. You like her, or you almost do." I shrugged.

"Why would you say that?" He asked, incredulous.

"Because you took it, you son of bitch." I replied and laughed. Noah laughed too and I punched him in the arm. "Come on, Rachel isn't as bad as you thought she was."

Noah sighed and leaned his head against the back of the seat. "No, I guess she isn't."

We rode the rest of the way in comfortable silence. I kept thinking of the camping trip and the way that they would look at each other when they thought no one was looking. Noah would look up and see Rachel and scowl, but when she laughed or made a joke, he would look confused, like he couldn't believe that it was her he was looking at, like maybe she was really someone else. Rachel would do they same thing. She would see Noah, sitting across from her and she would frown; but then he would do something, like when he had offered to help me play Call of Duty, and she would smile, almost in surprise, almost as if she couldn't believe he was real.

I shook it off when I finally reached the turn into my house and parked in the driveway. It was all so tortured and convoluted, I should really stop trying to make something grand of of nonsense.


	10. I'm Not Who You Think I Are

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did Mark Salling wouldn't even know what a shirt was. Haha.**

**A/N: I have no idea how I made this chapter. I'm not sure it's going to work. Reviews are love.**

**(Rachel)**

I knocked nervously on the yellow door of Claudia's home. There were no cars in the drive-way, but she had invited me. I looked at my fathers in the car and raised my hands in a confused gesture.

"No one's answering." I said, even though it was impossible for them to hear me. I reached down to grab my overnight bag as I heard heard the doorknob move. After a few unsuccessful attempts the door finally opened to reveal a shirtless Noah.

I stared, shocked, at his nakedness. "What are you doing here, Berry?"

"I-I-I was invited?" I looked at my fathers waiting in the car.

Noah peeked his head around the door frame and nodded his head at my fathers in recognition. "Fine. Come in." He grumbled before walking from the door to let me through.

Waving my fathers good-bye, I clutched my overnight bag and entered Claudia's home. I stood in the door way for a moment before Noah startled me from where he sat on the couch.

"Where you born in a barn or something, Berry? Close the door." He snapped.

"I'm sorry, " I said, shutting the door, "I didn't mean to be rude. Where's Claudia?"

"She's at work." He said, not looking at me.

"I'm going to place my things in Claudia's room." I said. Noah simply raised his eyebrows. I stopped dead in my tracks on my out of Claudia's room. _When did I stop referring to Noah as Puck?_ It couldn't possibly be because Claudia would constantly correct me when I did, and it wasn't because I forced myself to call him Noah. I simply did. Puck was no longer Puck, but Noah.

"Berry? Are you okay?" Noah was waving his hands in front of my face.

"What?" I slapped his hand down. "I'm fine, why do you ask?"

"Well," He huffed, "I've been trying to talk to you for the last ten minutes. Claud is going to be late. They're making her work an extra shift and she still has to go to the store for dinner. She said you can go home if you want."

"Why wouldn't simply contact me?" I asked.

He raised his eyebrows. "She did. I heard your phone go off, like, a dozen times."

I reached around into my pocket to t retrieve my phone. There were, in fact, 7 text messages all from Claudia.

*Hey. I will be late getting home. I still have to go to the store. You should probably show up closer to 6.*

*I have to work the next shift. I won't even be home until 9. Is that okay?*

*It would probably be better to hangout tomorrow night or something. You can just stay home if you want.*

*Rachel? Are you getting my texts?*

I skipped over the rest, assuming they were similar to the last one. I sighed heavily and leaned against the wall. "I suppose it would be best for me to go home." I said to no one in particular.

"That's a long way for your dads to come back to pick you up." Noah said and made me jump.

"I would rather not bother you with my presence, Noah. I'll call them." I said opening my phone back up.

Noah grabbed my phone from my hand and I began to protest. "Don't worry about it, Berry."

"Really, Noah, I don't want to be a disturbance—" I began.

"Chill, Rachel. We'll just wait for Madonna to get home to give you a ride home." He said and handed me my phone back.

I stared at my phone resting in my hand. Noah turned and walked across the kitchen in to the living room and flopped onto the couch, grabbing the remote. _Rachel._

**(Noah)**

I turned the channel to _Top_ _Gear_. I waited for Rachel to complain, but instead she pulled her knees to her chest and smiled happily. I raised an eyebrow expectantly at her. When she noticed she smiled wider.

"Daddy is huge car aficionado. We watch this program regularly." she said.

I rolled my eyes and turned back to the TV where Richard, James, and Jeremy where driving a convertible van through an automatic car wash.

I hated that I didn't hate Rachel. It was easier that way. I wouldn't have cared that Rachel was in Riverton, if it wasn't for that fact that she was becoming friends with Claud. Because now I had to see her as another person and when I went back to Lima and went back to being Puck (because I would, I knew it, even if I didn't want to be Puck anymore.) it would be harder than ever. It was already getting really fucking hard to do. Every summer I would walk onto that plane and I couldn't forget what it was like, being loved by someone like Claudia, loving Claudia.

_I stood away from my family as they introduced themselves to each other. It was totally lame. Josh was totally making a mistake getting tied down like this. He only laughed at me and said I might understand someday and that he was just like me once._

"_Noah," My mother pulled me forward, "This is Claudia. She's your age."_

"_What's up?" She lifted her chin at me. I looked at the girl in front of me. Her long black hair was pulled into a side ponytail, and her blues looked smugly into mine._

Great, a butch chick. _I thought as I put my hand out. "Puck." I said._

_She raised her eyebrows and shook my hand. "Claudia." She adjusted the flannel shirt she wore over a tank top. I took a moment to appreciate her form in her tight dark jeans. Lesbian, cousin or not, she was hot._

_A wicked grin rose on her face, "Puck, like the fairy?" she asked._

"_Excuse me?" I sneered. _Did she just call me gay?

_She had this knowing look in her eyes as she looked me up and down. "Are you a fan of William Shakespeare, _Puck_?" She asked._

"_What are you saying?" I asked._

"_Oh good. You're not gay. I would be jealous of all of those lucky men if you were gay." She was laughing. She wasn't even trying to stop herself._

"_You think I'm gay." I said._

_She raised her eyebrows devilishly and nodded. "I'm not going to call you Puck."_

"_You're not going to call me Noah." I threatened._

"_I'm hungry mommy!" Dani cried tugging on Mom's pant leg._

"_Of course. Madonna, we're all starving. It's been a long plane ride."_

_Madonna was already picking Dani up and placing her on her hip. "Well, we can't have that, can we, Dani?" Dani shook her head furiously. "Let's go."_

_Claudia watched as our mothers and younger siblings left thought automatic doors and then turned to me. "I guess since I can't call you Noah, I'll just call you Homo." She smiled. I clenched my fists in anger. I had never wanted to hit a girl so much in my life. "Nice haircut, by the way." she added sarcastically and follows our families._

"_My hawk is badass." I manage before finally following her._

I pouted as I remembered the first time I met Claud. She wasn't as impressed with my facade as everyone else was. Cole had been doubly impressed with it, and Claud was having a hard time pushing him past it. I had apologised to her, more than once, for that. But she would just pat my cheek and tell me that it wasn't all my fault. Cole was only a little lost, and he needed someone as strong as me to look to. When I moved on, so would he.

"_Homo." She said._

"_Don't call me that. My name is Puck." I glared at her._

_A smile graced her lips. "Come on. I'm going to a party and you have to come. Eli said so."_

"_I'll go if you stop calling me Homo." I replied. I was sitting son the couch in their living room. The second summer the Puckerman's had spent in Wyoming. The first one had been for the wedding, but this one had been a fluke. I told Mom that I would rather die than come back to Wyoming and deal with Claudia. Mom had scoffed at my declaration and told me to pack for two weeks, I had packed for three days._

_I guess I had to like her, because she was actually really funny and she had awesome taste in music and she liked random explosions in movies. But she still called me Homo._

"_I'm not going to call you Puck." She said leaning against the doorway to the kitchen._

_I narrowed my eyes at her. "Fine, you can call me Noah."_

_She grinned and clapped her hands in a little happy dance. "Awesome. You know, I didn't really think it would work. I thought I was going to call you Homo forever. I was actually looking forward to it."_

"_When's this stupid birthday party?" I asked ignoring her comment._

_Confusion wrinkled Claudia's face, "there's no birthday party."_

"_Then what the hell were you just talking about?" I asked._

"_Language, Noah." My mother chastised as she passed through the room into the kitchen._

"_Oops, I guess I lied." She said, guilt not even registering._

_I jumped up from my place on the couch. "I'm going to kill you!" I shouted before running for her._

_She jumped from the doorway and shot out the front door into the yard. I tackled her at the bottom of the step and we landed in the grass with a soft 'oomph.' She was laughing as she punched me in the ribs. I couldn't hit her outright, so I slammed the inside of my elbow into her side. She huffed as her breath pushed from her lungs at the strength of my blow._

_I stood. She popped up from the ground, taking a boxer stance. "Come on Noah. Be a real man, hit me." She smiled._

_I raised my own hands and swung slowly in a wide right hook. She ducked and quickly jabbed her left fist into my ribs. I growled and she laughed. I jabbed quickly with my left and she didn't swerve fast enough and I got one good hit to her shoulder. She stepped back from the force, but recovered quickly. She bounced from foot to foot excitedly. I faked a right and hooked with my left. She attempted to duck but I hit her square in the stomach._

_She fell to then ground. I was quickly by her side apologising._ IKnew I shouldn't have hit a girl._ Her hands were covering her face and she was shaking. "Shit. Don't cry."_

_She punched me hard in the stomach and I collapsed in the grass next to her. "the party is in half an hour." she said, laughter bubbling from her mouth._

I was snapped from my thoughts as Claud burst through the door.

"Noah you would not _believe_ the day I've had." She said, throwing reusable grocery bags on the kitchen counter.

"Hello, Claudia." Rachel said from where she sat on the couch. "I thought you weren't going to arrive home for quite awhile."

Claud shook her head in shock when she noticed Rache—_Berry_. Berry siting on the couch. "I thought so too, but the girl who I was covering finally showed up. What are you doing here?"

"She was waiting for Madonna to get back. Her fathers were already gone by the time she got your texts." I supplied. They gave me a strange look, but I ignored it and stared at the TV screen. "What's for dinner?" I asked, trying to ease the sudden tension in the room.

**PS. If you don't watch Top Gear, you need to. I don't know anything about cars, and honestly I could care less, but I love that show. Seriously, watch it.**

**Handshakes, High-Fives, and Happy Dances.  
lalalamarieme**


	11. And Then

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did Mark Salling wouldn't even know what a shirt was. Haha.**

**A/N: Cyle, although spelled with a C, is pronounced like Kyle. It's just the way it is. This chapter is kind of short, but not to worry there are plenty ofr goodies in the next one! Reviews are love!**

"_Cyle, buddy! What's up?" I greeted into my hand._

"_Oh, nothing. I'm back in town and I thought we could hang out. Maybe watch a movie." He replied._

"_Sure. Are you busy right now?" I asked._

_Dani Puckerman was currently attached to my left leg. "Who are you talking to?" She asked, clinging tighter to my leg._

_I pulled the phone from my mouth, 'I'm talking to my friend, sweety. You know, Cole would probably be better at this than me." I pointed at my little brother currently standing in the yard talking to Noah._

"_Okay!" Dani said cheerfully and ran to Cole, wrapping her body tightly around his leg. Cole shot me a dirty look and I stuck my tongue out at him._

"_I won't be in about 20 minutes." Cyle said._

"_Cool. Do you mind if my cousin Noah comes. I'm, like, his babysitter, or whatever." I said turning to go back in the house._

"_No problem. I'll be there in half an hour to pick you up." He said._

_We said our goodbyes and I stepped back onto the porch. "Noah." I called, "Get ready. We're leaving."_

"_Where are we going?" he asked._

_'You're going to meet more of my friends!" I replied happily._

Seeing Cyle across the room I leapt from my spot on the couch and landed with a thump against his chest.

"Cyle! I'm so happy to see you!" I squealed.

Cyle laughed and shook Noah's hand. "How was Florida, man?" Noah asked. "Any hot chicks?"

Cyle scoffed at Noah's question and rolled his eyes.

My friend Jeremy walked into the room and I jumped into his arms as well. He laughed and held me at arms length before saying, "How are you Claudia?"

"I'm wonderful, Jem." I sighed before giving him another quick hug. "How was your guy's vacation in Florida?"

Jem took Cyle's hand in his own and rubbed the knuckles softly. "It was great." he answered.

"_You didn't tell me that you friend was gay!" Noah whispered to me as Cyle left to get more popcorn from the kitchen._

"_I didn't know it mattered." I responded nonchalantly._

_Noah's eyes nearly popped out of his head with the look he gave me, but I ignored it. "You're kidding me, right? You called me Homo for almost an entire year and you didn't know if it matters that your friend is a faggot?"_

_I snapped my head to Noah and raised my eyebrows incredulously. "Excuse you?" I said. "Would you like to take that back before you regret it?" I asked._

_Before he even had a chance to reply, I pivoted in my seat. "What's wrong with being gay?" I asked. I might have been speaking too quickly, or maybe I wasn't enunciating well enough because Noah just stared blankly at me. "Tell me Noah, what is wrong with being gay?" I asked. "If you're going to try the 'it's unnatural' bull on me, let me tell you something. There are plenty of same sex relations in the animal kingdom. Or maybe you're uncomfortable with the fact that Cyle might find you attractive. Do you find every woman you meet attractive, Noah?" Noah shook his head , his eyes wide. "Why are gay men required to find every single man attractive? It's the same story for Lesbians."_

_Noah tried to stutter out a sentence, but I cut him off before he got too far. "It's not about the way that the parts are supposed to fit together, even though they still fit pretty damn well. It's about how the other person makes you feel. It's about what their personality brings to yours."_

_Noah stared at me and I stared back. "You're a coward." I told him._

_He blinked owlishly, once, before saying, "You're right."_

**(Rachel)**

Claudia was standing in the yard, a soda can in her hand, talking to a young man, when my fathers dropped me off in the street in front of her home. The sinking sunlight shone off of her dark hair and made her pale skin glow.

"Hey, Rachel." Claudia greeted warmly. "This is my friend, Jeremy."

I shook hands with the thin boy. His curly hair cut short, his teeth flashed with the silver metal of braces.

"It's absolutely wonderful to meet you, Rachel." Jeremy said. "Claudia has been talking about you all week. So has Noah." He added.

I blushed when he mentioned Noah. Claudia seemed to noticed and smiled softly at me.

"Noah and Cyle are inside." She motioned towards the front door of her home.

*****

It seemed as though every time I thought I had a grasp on Noah, I lost it. It appeared that, besides Claudia, his closest friend in Wyoming was a young man with spiked, blonde hair and a vast knowledge of sports, named Cyle; Jeremy's boyfriend.

Even though Cyle was very nice and easy to talk to, I was distracted thinking about how many times Noah had thrown, Kurt Hummel, the resident fairy, into the dumpster outside the school, or how many times Noah had been amongst the people quietly chanting 'dyke' as I walked by them in the halls.

Noah was a different person in Wyoming. He was kind and accepting and he seemed so happy here. I wondered if I could be a different person here too, and I wondered if I would be happy like Noah was.

**(Noah)**

"I guess we could just do it in the yard if we keep it down." Claud said, looking at the eager faces around her, mine included. Even Rachel looked a little excited.

We all laughed and slapped Claud high fives as we walked through the front door into the yard.

I don't know why I did it, but when I walked past Rachel I swung my arm around her tiny shoulders and asked, "Are you ready for this, Berry?"

Rachel huffed at me and replied, "Contrary to popular belief, Noah." She said, taking my hand from her shoulders and dropping it to my side, "I am not as innocent as you would like to think. My fathers and I have a very open relationship and when I became curious about alcohol at the age of eleven, they allowed me to taste a variety of beverages, and I quite often have wine with dinner."

"This isn't wine, Rach. This is hardcore." Claud said from the doorway.

"I am quite capable of handling myself." She replied and flounced past Claud. Claud smiled broadly at her reaction.

'I'm kind of worried about her." I said.

Claudia only raised her eyebrows curiously at me and said. "Don't worry. I'll keep her safe."

"Now I'm twice as worried!"

She threw a smile at me over her shoulder as she descended the stairs and I watched as she clapped Rachel on the back after taking a shot of tequila. _Tonight is going to be a long night._ I thought as I closed the door behind me.


	12. Lion Sleeps Tonight

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did Mark Salling wouldn't even know what a shirt was. Haha.**

**A/N: If you haven't already, read the sequel to this story _Ensuing Crazyness._ It's a series of one-shots set during the school year after _Crazyness Ensues._ I would really appreciate your feedback on both stories. Reviews are Love!**

**Additional Note: There is underage drinking in this chapter. There is also girl on girl. If you don't like, don't read. That is all. Thank you to all of the lovely readers who read... and like it. That part is important too. lol**

I watched as Rachel slammed back another shot of tequila and smiled. She wasn't at all like Noah had made her out to be.

"_She's a prude."_

"_She's a control freak."_

"_The only thing she listens to is Broadway shit."_

Unfortunately for for Noah, he was wrong. Rachel seemed to be fairly laid-back and she didn't listen _only_ to Broadway shit. The only thing I wasn't sure of was whether she was a prude.

She didn't dress like a prude.

**(Rachel)**

_Stupid Noah and his stupid..... stupid._ I must have drank more than I realised, because I wasn't even capable to form a coherent thought.

Claudia's yard was really dark and I didn't like the shadowy faces of the people standing in her yard. I could see Claudia and Noah sitting on the porch as she drank from a rather large cup filled with green kool-aid and rum. Noah sat beside her, nursing a beer, and watching me. I didn't like him watching me.

I noticed the large patch of grass in the front of the house bathed in rose colored light from a street lamp.

**(Noah)**

Rachel stumbled to the front of the yard into the light from the street lamp. I watched silently as Claud patted me on the knee and smirked at me.

"I got this." she winked at me.

I rolled my eyes. "Bring her back in one piece. I replied.

I don't even know why I'm acting like this. I don't like Rachel. It's not like I care if she falls flat on her drunk face.

Instead I watched as Cyle slugged back his third shot of vodka, followed closely by Amanda. Jeremy and Savanna were each sipping on a bottle of Mike's Hard.

Austin and Molly stumbled off to his car across the street, probably to have sex in her car. Claud didn't like people having sex in her house when she wasn't one of them. Austin had offered, but Claud isn't really into Jews. I know. I tried.

**(Claudia)**

I watched as Austin and Molly stumbled to her car across the street. "They're going to have sex." I said as I sat next to Rachel.

"What if they caught?" She asked, worried.

I laughed. "It's two in the morning! No one cares that they're having sex."

"You care." She said.

"I don't!" I countered.

She batted her eyelashes at me. "Then wouldn't you let them have sex in your house?" She asked.

I thought that Noah might be wrong. Openly talking about sex and batting her eyelashes at me? Totally not a prude and totally seducing me.

"I'm selfish and petty. I want Molly all to myself and since I can't have her, I guess I like to make it harder for Austin." I explained.

Rachel sighed and leaned her head against my shoulder. "You really like her, don't you?"

I watched as the car rocked gently to Molly and Austin's drunken rhythm. My heart clenched in my chest, but only a little. "I used to." I replied and wrapped my arm around her waist.

"What happened?"

"I distanced myself from her. I didn't want to get in the way of their relationship. Austin and Molly are my friends."

"But if you really wanted to be with her, why wouldn't you do anything in your power to have her?" Rachel asked. She moved her head from my shoulder and turned her head to me.

I looked into her large brown eyes. "It's only high school, Rachel." I said.

She pushed back from where she was sitting and rested her hand against her chest. "High school defines who you are, who you will be for the rest your life!" she breathed.

I laughed. I couldn't help it. She was so serious. "That's bullshit!" I said. I ignored the small gasp she emitted at my exclamation. "The only thing that defines who you are and who you will be is you." I poked her in the arm.

**(Rachel)**

I watched as Claudia laid back in the grass of her front yard. I wasn't sure if it was the way her pale skin contrasted against the dark grass or if it was the rose glow of the street lamp, maybe it was the five shots of tequila I took only minutes ago, but I had never seen anything more beautiful than the Claudia in that moment.

Claudia squinted and furrowed her brow. "What are you staring at?" She asked.

I laid in the grass as well. I enjoyed the feeling of the grass against my skin. "I was staring at you." I said. I don't know what made me say it.

"Why?" she sighed. Her hand found mine and I felt out fingers lace together in the grass.

"You look so pretty." I sighed back.

I turned my head to look at her in the grass. Her eyes were shining and her hair had fallen gracefully around her head.

She closed her eyes, bit her lip and turned her head towards mine. "You look pretty too." She said. Her eyes were heavily lidded as she gazed at me.

"Thank you." I said. My breathing was suddenly shallow. I could feel adrenaline rushing through my veins. "Claudia?" I asked.

"Yeah?" She smiled at me. For a moment I was afraid she knew what I was going to ask her.

"Would you kiss me?" I asked.

Confusion blurred Claudia's soft features. "What do you mean? Would I kiss you ever or would I kiss you right now?"

"Either one."

Claudia shifted onto her elbow and leaned over me. A soft smile graced her lips as she bit her bottom lip and brushed her fingers through my hair. I felt my breath catch in my throat as Claudia's lips pressed against mine.

**(Noah)**

I watched silently from around the corner as Claudia rested on her elbow and kissed Rachel. First I was turned on, then I was strangely jealous. It didn't make any sense. Rachel was a threat to me, to my life in Lima.

I cleared my throat loudly and leaned against the side of the house bathed in the rose light of the street lamp.

"You really are a lesbian." I said. They broke apart when they realised I was there.

"Suck it." Rachel said from where she was laying in the grass.

Claudia laughed as she laid back in the grass. "Can we help you Noah?" she asked.

"Yeah." I said. "Tell me next time, so I can bring a camera."

They both laughed this time. Claudia rolled onto her stomach and stepped into a standing position.

She punched my arm as she walked past me. "Come on Cousin. I'm not even wasted yet!"

I raised my bottle at her as she walked into the darkness of the yard.

"So you're a lesbo now, Berry?" I asked.

"My name is Rachel." she said, almost to herself.

I sat down next her in the grass with my arms around my knees. "I know what you're name is."

"Why do you hate me?" she asked. She was waving her hand in the air above her face.

"I don't hate you, Berry. Why are you doing that?"

"My hand feels really heavy." She said. "If you don't hate me, then why won't you use my name?" She asked.

I sighed. "If I use your name, then you would be real."

"I'm not real?"

"You're real." I laughed.

"Then what you do mean?" She was still waving her hand above her, flexing her fingers slowly. "My hand is so small. How can it be so heavy if it's so small?"

I took her hand from the space above her head. "I'm a different person here. I feel real when I'm here. Everyone and everything in Lima feels like a bad dream. If I call you by your name, then maybe, maybe my bad dreams won't be dreams anymore, maybe they'll be real." I sandwiched her tiny hand between both of mine. "You're hand isn't that heavy." I said softly.

Rachel was watching me with her wide eyes. Feeling the awkward silence pressing down on us, I cleared my throat and clumsily stood. I looked down at Rachel as she lay on the ground. She blinked at me and I extended my arm to lift her. She accepted my hand and we walked back into the darkness.


	13. It Happened in the Half Light

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did Mark Salling wouldn't even know what a shirt was. Haha.**

**A/N: It's been a long time coming, but here it is, finally! No, this not the end, only the beginning. And no, just because it happened does not mean it's going to get all relationship-y. It's a moment, only a moment.**

"Uh, Noah."

"What?"

"You forgot the pie."

"Shut up!" He whined and and tossed a package of paper towels at me.

I laughed and stored them under the kitchen sink.

"I'm thinking game night." I said as I put food I the refrigerator.

"What kind of games?" He asked asked sorting the bags into categories. Fridge, freezer, cupboards, and other.

"I don't know. Board games. Improv games. Who cares?"

"Is Rachel coming?"

I froze. "Is Rachel coming?" I repeated.

"I asked you first." He said. Noah had noticed the I had stopped putting things in their respective places. "What?" he asked. "She's sort of my friend too." He defended.

"Yeah, sure." I said and resumed my task.

We continued our chore in silence while I pondered about last night, (when I saw Noah and Rachel holding hands in my front yard) and Noah listen to his iPod at a horrendously high level.

"Wait, there's no such thing as unicorns?" My phone questioned as it received a text message. I opened it quickly and squealed with excitement when I realised who it was. I quickly tapped a reply and snapped my phone close.

Noah pulled a bud from his ear. "What are you so happy about?" he asked.

"Aaron is coming tonight!" I replied happily.

**(Noah)**

"What?" I hated that douchebag, Aaron. "Why?"

Claud bit her bottom lip. "I invited him, Noah." She said cheekily.

I just ignored her and turned back to finish putting all of the groceries away. I turned my iPod down so I could listen to Claud's phone go off. Every time Sammy's voice sounded she literally dived for her phone.

I hated the little noises she made as she read his texts. Most of them were just laughs but sometimes she would sigh, excited sighs, sexy sighs. I hated it.

It's not like I want to fuck her or something. Claud's a big girl, she can handle herself, usually. Sometimes she's too trusting and Aaron is the kind of guy she has a weakness for.

I have no proof that's he's not anything but a nice guy, but I'm pretty sure that he's going to hurt her.

**(Rachel)**

It was actually kind of cute the way the Noah was trying to protect Claudia. Aaron seemed like a decent guy and Claudia was certainly infatuated with him.

Aaron slung his arm around her shoulder and Claudia leaned into him. Noah only scowled at every romantic advance Aaron made with Claudia,. and attempted friendship with either me or with Noah himself.

I smiled to myself when I saw Aaron bow his head towards Claudia's and kiss her softly on the lips. She blushed deeply and bit her lip. No one else noticed, except Noah.

He jumped up from his seat across the room with murder in his eyes. Afraid of what he might do, I to jumped from my seat and took three steps towards him. I pushed him quickly into the kitchen.

He tried to shove me out of the way, but I grasped onto his body before he could successfully remove me from his path.

"What are you doing, Rachel? Did you see what that douchebag was doing?" he whispered, staring at Claudia and Aaron in the living room.

"Yes, Noah." I whispered in reply, "I saw. That's why I'm trying to stop you!"

"What?"

"Aaron makes her happy!" I said.

"She's too good for him." He replied, still not looking at me.

"It's a fool who looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart."

"English, Rachel. I speak English."

I huffed out an irritated breath. "The heart wants what the heart wants, Noah. It doesn't matter if he deserves her or not."

"It matters to me."

"You can't protect her, because she won't let you." I replied.

Noah seemed to realise the truth of my words and looked down at me. His concern turn to confusion and then quickly to smugness.

**(Noah)**

"If you wanted a piece of the Puckerone, Rachel, all you had to do was ask, not molest me." I said.

Rachel took a small step back as she realised how close we were. "You called me Rachel." She deflected.

"Succumbing to the inevitable." I shrugged, and took a step closer towards her.

"I think I prefer it." she said softly and took another step towards the living room.

I grabbed Rachel by the waist and lifted her tiny frame to the other side of me. "I think I do too." I said inching her away from the living room, across the kitchen, into Claudia's room.

She gasped softly as her back hit the door to Claudia's room. I smirked. I couldn't help it. I guess I have a thing for destroying innocence. I pushed gently near the knob and pushed the door open.

We walked silently into the dark room. I didn't bother to close it. It would be more noticeable if it closed.

I loved the way that Rachel was biting her lip as we padded across the carpet. I slid my arms around the small of her back and placed her on the bed.

**(Rachel)**

The cool satiny texture of Claudia's duvet cover felt familiar as Noah lay on top of me. Our legs tangled together over the edge of the mattress. His jeans felt rough against my skin.

I could feel my blood rushing through my veins as his lips neared mine. It seemed so strange to me, that after a lifetime in Ohio where I was practically ignored by everyone, I had come to Wyoming expecting the same thing only to be tossed into a situation like this.

"I'm going to kiss you now, Rachel Berry." Noah whispered into my neck.

I nodded mindlessly in anticipation.

I felt his breath move from my neck to my jaw and finally it stilled over my lips. His lips touched mine and I almost died in bliss His lips were soft and gently caressed my own as they moved together.

**(Noah)**

We were barely even kissing, this was like, the most modest kiss I had had since I was thirteen. So it didn't make any sense that this was the most excited I had ever been to kiss a girl. I was just about to deepen the kiss when someone stood in the doorway.

The shadow blocked the crooked scrap of light in the room and plunged the small space into darkness. Rachel froze underneath me. Hoping to God that it wasn't Claudia standing in the doorway, I glanced at the body in the door frame.

Thankfully, it was Cyle. He was staring wide eyed at Rachel and me on the bed, loosely gripping a soda can.

"Take a picture, perv. It'll last longer." I said, not moving from my spot.

"Ugh. Please, Noah. I'm gay."

"I know." I replied. "Do you want a piece of Puckzilla, too?" I asked.

Cyle only waved his hands and walked away.

"Is he going to tell everyone?" Rachel asked from beneath me.

"Probably. Cyle is the biggest gossip I know, besides the other gay."

Rachel creased her brow in confusion, which I thought was actually kind of cute.

"Who's the other gay?"

"No one. Some kid who moved here from Colorado and he doesn't get along with Cyle, is all." I said.

**(Rachel)**

It wasn't that I was uncomfortable underneath Noah. I simply did not find the prospect of being caught in this position twice, in one night, attractive.

"Uh, Noah?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"It's not that I'm not enjoying our current situation, but could you please?"

Noah looked down our bodies to where they met near our stomachs. "Yeah, I'll do that." he said and pushed himself into a standing position.

"Thank you." I said and sat up.

"I'm going to—"

"Yeah, yes. I'll be there in a minute."

I watched as his figure blocked the light from the room momentarily, and retreated back across the kitchen and into the living room.

"What the hell was that?" I whispered to the empty room.

**(Claudia)**

I didn't notice Noah leave, but I sure as hell saw him coming back into the living room. He looked, I don't know, confused, maybe.

I didn't notice Rachel leave, either. I was surprised to see she had also come from the kitchen. She looked confused, too. I looked around the living room to see if anyone else was missing. No one was, but Cyle was sitting across the room looking between Noah and Rachel with a strange look on his face.

I excused myself from Aaron's side, which was such a travesty, because I really liked it there.

I flopped down next to Cyle and looked candidly at him. "Spill." I stated simply.

Cyle only looked at me with feigned surprise and then turned his head back to the television, where a horrendously awful horror movie flashed across the screen. I think there may have been a tiny, mutant, baby sheep chomping on an activist's ear, but I wasn't sure. "I don't know what you are talking about." He said.

"Fine." I replied. "I won't push it, but I'll have you know that I will find out. I know something happened with the three of you, and someone will break eventually."

"I'm betting on Rachel." He said, still refusing to look at me.

"I'm betting on Noah."

**Brownie points to any and all who can name the references to the TV shows and movies that I mention through-out the entire story! Leave me a review so that I know that I am not completely obscure...**


	14. Sometimes We Need Some Time

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**A/N: Ok, so. It's been hella long since I have posted last, but this chapter is super long, so hopefully no one will be angry with me! Reviews are where it's at, so do that even if you just want to, like, talk about Phineas & Ferb, cause I love those guys...**

"I know something happened with you and Rachel." I said as Noah handed me a soapy dish.

Noah froze, mid-motion, and said, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Of course you don't." I said and dropped the subject. Pushing a topic wasn't my style. If someone didn't want to tell me something, that was their choice.

Even though I was itching with curiosity and I wanted to beg Noah to tell me, I just couldn't. I liked to know what was happening, sure; gossip is a part of nature. It just didn't seem right to force it.

"So, what should we do tonight?" I asked.

"I don't know, Claud." Noah grumbled.

"What's your problem?"

"I'm sick of doing stuff. Can we just sit at home and watch old movies?"

"The Breakfast Club?" I asked hopefully.

"I'm totally Judd Nelson." He replied in agreement.

**(Rachel)**

I was both dreading and hoping that Claudia would cancel our plans for the night. We had agreed last night, after the last round of Apples to Apples, before the bad horror movies (and kissing Noah in the half light of Claudia's bedroom), to go see a movie both of us had wanted to see.

I was afraid that Noah would either join us at the theater, or that Claudia would attempt to ask me about what had happened with him. I saw her watching me when I entered the living room, and I noticed the way Cyle had been looking between Noah and I.

When Claudia had sat next to Cyle and whispered to him, I was afraid that he was going to tell her about what he had seen. He had, however, rebuffed her and continued to watch the movie that was playing.

My phone vibrated on my desk and I eagerly opened it.

*Sorry Rachel, but I'm not feeling up to it tonight, I'm just going to hang with the fam tonight. I'll text you later and we'll make plans.*

A relieved sigh escaped my lips.

*It's not a problem. I would also like to spend some time with my family. I will contact you tomorrow. Goodnight.*

Claudia didn't reply and I felt as though a thousand pounds had been lifted off of my chest. I was safe for at least another day.

I wasn't sure why I was so upset about what had happened. Noah was a very attractive young man. Albeit, he was crass and rude, but it seemed as though he was more in touch with his human side than I had ever known. I decided it was because I didn't know him that well, and I was uncertain of what, exactly, I was getting myself into.

_Maybe it would be worth finding out._ I thought to myself.

**(Noah)**

I just needed sometime to think. I didn't know why I had kissed her. It's not like I was embarrassed or anything. I mean, come on, look at me. I'm a stud. I could wear a dress to school and people would think it was cool.

Maybe I wasn't the only one who felt like two different people. I wasn't a douche-y jerk here, and it seemed totally possible that Rachel Berry wasn't a loud, show-choir freak.

I stretched as the movie ended and looked at Claud, sleeping on my bed. Which was actually the couch in the living room, but whatever.

"Claud." I said, poking her in the leg. "Get off of my bed."

Claud mumbled something I couldn't understand and I poked her again.

"If you don't move I'm going to sleep in your room."

"Carry me." she said, as she repositioned her head on her hands.

I sighed and lifted her bridal style off of the couch. As I lay her on the covers I heard her mumble, and I heard my name.

"What's that?" I asked.

"I think I was wrong." She said.

"How's that?"

"Maybe, you can be two people, but I'm afraid it might tear you apart. I think you'll have to choose one, before you break forever." she said sleep tainting the gravity of her words.

"Go to sleep." I commanded.

"Snuggle with me. I'm lonely in this big bed." she sighed.

I looked at the queen-sized bed that consumed most of the room, and thought it would be hella more comfortable than the couch.

"Move over." I said.

I wrapped Claud in my arms and twined my fingers with hers.

"Who do you think you'll choose?" Claudia asked.

"What?"

"Noah or Puck?"

"I don't know yet. Do I have to choose right now?"

"Yes."

I could tell that she wanted me to say one and not the other. Her breathing was becoming less rhythmic as she came out of her haze of sleep.

"Noah." I said. "I'm going to choose Noah. Now go to sleep."

That seemed to make her happy and her breathing began to deepen again as she fell into a heavy sleep.

Honestly, I didn't know if I could choose. It scared the shit out of my that I even had to.

**(Claudia)**

I wasn't surprised to find Noah in bed with me. It happened sometimes, when I was half asleep and feeling lonely. We had our backs pressed against each other and the morning light was filtering though the windows.

I heard Noah stir and felt him stretch against me.

"Good morning." I greeted.

"Morning." He mumbled in reply.

"Do you feel better today?" I asked.

"Yeah, I guess."

We lay in silence, almost falling back to sleep.

"You like Rachel. I know you do."

Noah didn't even respond.

"I'm only worried that if you act on it, you might hurt her when you get to Lima. I know that it's different for you here, but it's hard to change overnight. I was wrong. You can be two people. I'm just afraid that if it happens for too long, you'll break."

Something like deja-vu washed over me. Noah lay still next to me.

"It's still up to you, though. It's a fool who looks for logic in the chambers the human heart, after all."

Noah, still silent, rolled out of the bed and left the room to let me get dressed.

Noah and I both had work today, so after our three mile run I dressed in my best jeans, with little studs on the back pocket, and a cute orange top with a white jacket over it.

When I opened my door, Noah was at the fridge in a dirty t-shirt and even dirtier jeans.

We laughed at each other and he handed me an apple from inside of the fridge. When I went to work fashion was important, but Noah just got blood and guts everywhere.

"You almost ready to go, cousin?" I asked.

He popped his neck and said, "Yep."

"That was awful. Don't do that anymore." I cringed.

He popped his knuckles. "Do what?" he smirked.

"You are such jerk. Get in the car before I leave your ass."

Noah and I walked down the steps towards my little car and Noah plugged his ipod into the console.

**(Noah)**

I really liked when Claud and I could sit in silence on our way to work or jam out to some rockin tunes.

Today was a Sublime kind of day.

_I gave her all that I had to give  
She still wouldn't take it, whoa no!  
Her two brown eyes are leaking like salty tears  
It still ruins her makeup and never want to give_

Wrong Way was blasting out of the speakers as Claud turned the corner to the meat house. We sang loudly and danced as best as the seat-belts would allow, and these were the days I loved best.

Days where I could just let completely loose and be crazy ans silly and exist. It didn't matter if my 'favorite' pastime was tossing that gay dude into a dumpster, or tipping over a port-a-potty with the wheelchair kid inside.

Claud did that. She left me forget all of the stupid, and mean things the I can do and she lets me be whatever I want to be. Maybe she pushed me in a better direction a little bit, but I didn't really mind.

Claud was silly and crazy and I loved that about her. (She loved that about her too.) She never let herself regret her decisions. She always saw the best part of every situation, and I mean every single one.

Last summer, Claud and I had been driving from Lander, a little town about 30 miles away, when we ran out of gas.

Wyoming is notorious for dead zones. You can literally go from end of town to another and lose three bars of service. That's four miles, people.

We couldn't get a signal to call anyone, so we had to walk the last ten miles to town. It kind of sucked because we knew it was going to rain. The sky had gotten dark and cloudy and the wind started to rise and whip around our faces.

It was awesome because We jammed out to our ipods, sharing songs with each other and laughing about the lyrics. It didn't matter that walked six miles before it started to rain or the we walked another two before someone had the heart to pick us up and give a ride to a gas station and back to the car.

We just did what ever we could to be happy in that moment, and she does that all of the time.

I waved goodbye to Claud as she drove off to work and I turned to greet Ted.

"Hey, man."

"Sup, gangsta?" He replied flashing imaginary gang signs.

**(Claudia)**

I cracked my neck and cringed at the popping sound that it made, pushing through the door that lead to the store I prepared my best smile. It was sometimes hard to work with people the way that I did.

I love my job, I do. It just gets hard to deal with people after a while.

Before I could even take three steps I smacked into a small body. I grabbed them and steadied them while I leaned hard against the door-frame.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I wasn't looking where I was going. I was just trying to find a dressing room and I saw that there was one over there and I just thought that I could—"

"It's no problem." I said. "Can I get your name and I'll get a room for you."

"Oh, Claudia." The body said as it picked up a couple of things that had fallen during our crash.

I laughed and took a few things from her hands. "Hey Rachel. I knew you missed me last night, but I had no idea..."

Rachel only smiled sheepishly and ground her toe onto the carpet.

I took the rest of the hangers from her hands and said, "Let me get you a dressing room."

**(Rachel)**

I was so embarrassed for running so blindly into Claudia, but she just laughed it off and set my things neatly in my room, separating the tops and bottoms and the folded items, and making idle chatter.

"I want to see everything." She said firmly, but there was still laughter in her eyes. "If I'm not waiting for you, you come and find me."

I smiled in agreement and closed the door to my room. As I was finishing the first outfit, I heard the little plaque that on the door rattle as Claudia wrote my name on it. I took a good loom at myself in the mirror and opened the door.

Claudia gave a low whistle. "You look good. I like it."

"Really?" I asked, turning to see my backside in the tiny white shorts.

"Definitely. You have legs for days."

I laughed. "What do you think of my top?" I asked. It was a deep purple strapless top with horizontal stripes down the length and palm trees silk-screened on it. It accentuated my shoulders and hugged my minimal curves perfectly.

"Cute, and we have a pair of sandals that look adorable with that outfit."

I spent the next two hours trying on countless sizes in different outfits. She didn't ask me once about Noah or what had happened the other night. I wanted to tell her, she was the closest thing I had ever had to a friend. She might actually be one.

That thought scared me a little bit, because it was kind of sad that I was 16 and I had never had a real friend before, and because I had never had someone to rely on before. I wasn't even sure that I was capable of such a thing.

I could tell that Claudia was very good at her job and that she loved it. I watched her as she helped not only me, but three other people in the dressing rooms and several others in the rest of the store.

She knew how to make someone feel confident in their choices and she walked such purpose.

If she wasn't already my friend, then maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she would be someday.


	15. I Need You Now, Like I Never Have Before

**A/N: That's right. Boondock Saints twice. It's that awesome.**

I walked into the house after a long day of lifting giant fucking boxes of meat and the first thing I hear is laughter. Rachel's laughter to be exact. The first thing I see is Rachel on the floor clutching her sides and tears streaming down her face. Savanna is on the couch above her in a similar position and Claud is stretched out on the second couch, gasping for air.

Then I notice what's playing on the TV screen. _Hamlet 2_. It's at the part where he's staring at the cat and cursing it. I've seen the movie before, it's pretty funny.

I can't help but wonder why Rachel is watching it. It doesn't seem refined enough for her and her stupid, pompous tastes.

"What is your fucking problem man?" Rachel laughed, echoing the line from the movie as best she could through her laughter.

Claudia and Savanna laughed even harder.

"What's going on?" I asked chuckling at the three girls and the fact that Rachel just totally said fuck, which is awesome.

"Movie marathon." Claudia weezed.

"Cool." I said and flopped down on the couch next to Savanna. "What's up next?"

"The Hangover!" Savanna replied happily.

"Sweet. Shit!"

**(Rachel)**

I didn't know that mentioning to Savanna the I had never seen _Boondock Saints_, which her and Claudia had been discussing, would lead to an entire day holed up in Claudia's living room, watching several movies.

I wasn't a fan of violence or gratuitous nudity or expletive language, but it was hard not to get caught up in the excitement that Savanna and Claudia generated. I actually found myself laughing when Rocco accidentally exploded his cat against his apartment wall, and when Dana Marschz flashed his nethers to his drama class, and even Rocco's over use of the word 'fuck' in the hotel scene had been funny.

A part of me was so glad that I was sharing this moment with Claudia and her friend. (Savanna was my friend as well, I suppose.) Another, much smaller part, was a little sad that I had denied myself of times like these. What had I been thinking, not watching these movies? I was finally beginning to understand pop culture!

Even Noah's presence couldn't bring me down. I had been fearful that seeing him again would break my resolve to never, ever tell Claudia about that night in her room with Noah. Luckily, for myself, I didn't not automatically confess when Noah walked through the door, but had simply kept laughing at one of the most hilarious movies I had ever seen.

Eight hours and five more movies later it was hitting 3 am. Claudia had considered driving me home, but I was far too comfortable on the couch.

"Get off of my bed, Rachel."

I noticed the surprised look on Claudia's face at Noah's use of my name.

"Mmm-mm." I mumbled. "I'm too comfy."

"Come sleep in my bed." Claudia replied groggily.

"No." I pouted. "I don't wanna to move."

I shut my eyes tight expecting someone to drag me from my, very warm, spot and into Claudia's rather large bed. Instead, I felt a body crawl behind me and cradle me into their arms.

"Good night, Berry." Noah breathed behind me, his breath hot on my neck, and someone else dropped a blanket over us.

I froze for a moment in fear, but as I felt sleep tighten its grip on me, I just snuggled into the warm body behind me.

**(Noah)**

I knew Aunt Madonna wouldn't like it when she found me and Rachel sleeping together on her couch. I didn't know that she would actually freak-the fuck-out.

I had expected to sleep peacefully until noon, when Claudia would wake me up for our run, get the evil eye from Auntie for couple of days, and face the awkwardness of how _not_ awkward it was to sleep with Rachel in my arms. I really, really didn't expect to be shook awake by a hysterical woman who slightly resembled my Aunt.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I hear her scream.

It's way too early for me to process what's happening right now, and it looks like its the same thing for Rachel. Shit, Rachel.

I snap awake, but Rachel is still in my arms, so I can't really go anywhere. I can hear the door to Claudia's room open across the kitchen and the only thing I can think is _thank fuck._

Claudia is trying to calm Auntie down and explain to her what happened, but then Auntie spews some bullshit about gays and their loose morals.

And then we're all awake.

Rachel isn't saying anything, and I wonder if that's a good or a bad sign. Claudia and Savanna are staring in disbelief at this woman that both of them know as their mother. Auntie's eyes are bulging, because she knows that she's said something really stupid and that there's no going back on it.

The silence is kind of crushing us all, but no one knows what to do.

Finally Claudia stomps her foot and and screams. It's not words or anything, but it's still really scary.

"Do you really believe that?" she demands. "Do you really think that?"

"No. I was just—" Auntie starts.

"Then why would you say it?" There are tears in Claudia's eyes now. "Why would you say something so horrible, and about my friend?"

"I didn't mean..." Madonna tries again.

"Would you ever say that about me? Would you ever say that I'm a terrible person because of my sexuality?"

"What do you mean?" Madonna asks.

That's when Rachel finally decides to move. She sits up on the couch and everyone is looking at her now.

"Come on." Savanna says, looking at Rachel for help. "You need to go home."

Rachel just nods and sets the blanket behind her, onto my knees. Claudia is in the kitchen now and she's holding the keys to her car. I can tell that she's going to cry, so I kick the blankets off of me and walk around Auntie to where everyone else is standing by the door.

I make sure it's locked as we leave, Auntie still standing in the middle of the living room.

**(Claudia)**

The car is silent as we drive out the the ranch. Rachel is staring out the window and I'm crying in the backseat as Noah drives.

I haven't told my mother yet. She doesn't know.

I'm so afraid, because there are women around town who dress like stereotypical lesbians. And my mom always looks at them with this awful sneer on her face and mumbles something that sounds kind of like "dyke."

I don't want my mother to hate me. I kind of like having a relationship with the person who provides so much for me. I'm only 17 and I know that I'm not ready to fend for myself yet.

Savanna is in the front seat, like always, she's no good at crying, I know. And Noah's gripping the steering wheel really tight, because he's no good with crying either.

We might be about five minutes away from Rachel's house when I can feel the tears stopping. I try not to be too loud as I sniffle and blow my nose, because, one, it's embarrassing, and two, it's gross.

Rachel pulls my hand from my lap and squeezes it before letting it rest on the seat between us. It feels good to have her tiny hand that barely fits around mine there. She's looking at me with this sad, comforting smile on her face and I'm trying not to cry anymore as I quirk my lips up into an embarrassed and grateful one.

Noah pulls into the driveway and Rachel squeezes my hand one more time before she gets out of the door. Noah waits until Rachel is inside of the door before he drives away.

Savanna lives a few more miles down the road on her grandparents ranch. When we finally leave her behind I crawl over the seat and into the front of the car. Noah makes it about two miles back in the direction we came before I can feel the tears start to well up again. Because I'm thinking about whether I have to tell my mother that I'm kind of gay or whatever.

Noah takes his hand in mine and he squeezes it. For a moment I have strange feeling of deja vu, because Rachel did the exact same thing in the back seat. Only this time it's Noah's giant hand wrapped around my fingers. I know he wants to say something, but he doesn't know what to do, so I just squeeze back and lace my fingers through his.

He takes me to breakfast at a doughnut shop on Main. They make their own ice cream there too, so of course we get some. There's nothing better than fresh doughnuts, homemade ice cream, and hot coffee on a disastrous morning like this one.

"What do you think I should do, Noah?"

"I' don't know." He replies. "I'll never have this problem, so..."

"You're such a jerk." I laugh, but I appreciate it.

Noah laughs, buts he doesn't respond, so I drop the subject. We finish our breakfast in silence and head home with a sense of foreboding.

She's gone by the time we get back. Off to work, I suppose. There is a note on the door to my room, though.

_I'm sorry._

That's all it says. I crumple it up and toss it in the trash.

**(Rachel)**

Somehow Claudia's mother had managed to get my cell phone number, because when I plop down on the bed in my room, the voicemail notification is going off.

"_This is Madonna Custer. Claudia's mom. I was just calling to apologise. I was very upset about finding my nephew, with a girl, on my couch, in my home. Uh, I don't know why I would say such an awful thing, but I can't take it back. I'm sorry."_

I delete it right away. I'm too angry at this woman to listen to her. The number she called from is blocked, other wise I would call it back and give her a piece of my mind.

I'm curled up in a ball, chin on my knees, when Daddy pokes his head in the door. He's knows that I'm upset because of the way that I'm sitting.

"Anthony." Daddy calls quietly, his head disappearing behind the door.

Daddy crosses the room and sits next to me on the bed.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" he ask brushing a stray lock of hair from my face.

"Nothing." I reply.

Then Dad is there and he's holding a cup of water for me and I start crying, really crying. They don't ask why and I'm thankful, because I know that Madonna didn't _really _mean to be so hateful when she said it. It still stung, though. And maybe I'm crying because it hurt Claudia and Savanna and Noah just as much as it did me.

Once the tears have dried, I drink the cool water gratefully and sigh as I snuggle against Daddy.

"Do you want to tell us what's wrong?" Dad asks?

"No."

"Okay." Dad says and cuddles on my other side.


End file.
